Gertrude's Theorem

Ever since Gerts was founded 44 years ago, they have always been there for your drinking needs. Whether it's a regular old Friday night or the middle of the afternoon on Monday, you can always depend on them (RIP SSMU reno). Introducing Gertrude's Theorem; ever been strapped on coinage, and wondered if you should get a pitcher of your favorite sangria or a few pints of St.Ambroise IPA, but can't decide? Gertrude's theorem calculates the the amount of alcohol per dollar you get when purchasing your favorite drink.

Gertrude's Theorem was founded by Ashkaan Mohtashami and Michael Kratsios on December 1st, 2015. Transcribed by Malcolm McClintock

Last Updated Jan 2018

• It is rumoured that the CEO Charles Wilson used the Gertz to gain his fortune, come meet his dog at: tinyurl.com/n4fo2kfw

Daily Deals & Specials

Category:Curator's Choice

{|

 class="wikitable collapsible sortable alternating"
! Class !! Size !! Type !! Gertz [Gz] !! Cost !! Percent !! Volume [mL]


|-


| Beer || Tallboy || style="background-color:#102C73;color:White" | PBR || 7.73 || $  3.00 || 4.9% || 473


|-


| Beer || Bottle || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Sleeman Rousse || 6.51 || $  3.00 || 5.5% || 355


|-


| Beer || Bottle || style="background-color:SaddleBrown; color:White" | Sleeman Honey Brown || 6.15 || $  3.00 || 5.2% || 355


|-


| Beer || Bottle || style="background-color:#a3b74b" | Moosehead || 5.92 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || Bottle || style="background-color:Chocolate; color:White" | Sleeman Cream Ale || 5.92 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || Bottle || style="background-color:Gold" | Sleeman Original || 5.92 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || Bottle || style="background-color:#3AB34A" | Sleeman Silver Creek || 5.92 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || Bottle || style="background-color:#937565" | St. Ambroise Stout || 5.92 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || Bottle || style="background-color:#DCE4B1" | Moosehead Light || 4.73 || $  3.00 || 4.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || Bottle || style="background-color:#B8D9EB" | Sleeman Clear || 4.73 || $  3.00 || 4.0% || 355


|}






{|

 class="wikitable collapsible sortable alternating"
! Class !! Size !! Type !! Gertz [Gz] !! Cost !! (Primary Alc) Percent !! Volume [mL]


|-


| Sangria || Pitcher || style="background-color:#e0c9ff" | Flood-Gria || 6.85 || $14.00 || 40.0% || 1800


|-


| Sangria || Pitcher || style="background-color:Gold" | Gerts Sangria || 6.32 || $14.00 || 40.0% || 1800


|-


| Sangria || Pitcher || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Red Sangria || 6.09 || $14.00 || 17.8% || 1800


|-


| Sangria || Pitcher || style="background-color:#8de0d3" | Green Sangria || 5.94 || $14.00 || 17.3% || 1800


|-


| Sangria || Pitcher || style="background-color:OrangeRed;color:White" | Tequila Sangria || 5.79 || $14.00 || 37.5% || 1800


|-


| Sangria || Pitcher || style="background-color:Azure" | White Sangria || 5.57 || $14.00 || 16.3% || 1800


|-


| Sangria || Pitcher || style="background-color:Pink" | Pink Sangria || 5.19 || $14.00 || 30.5% || 1800


|-


| Sangria || Pitcher || style="background-color:Snow" | Snowgria || 4.20 || $14.00 || 12.3% || 1800


|}






{|

 class="wikitable collapsible sortable alternating"
! Class !! Size !! Type !! Gertz [Gz] !! Cost !! Percent !! Volume [mL]


|-


| Beer || Half Pint || style="background-color:DarkOliveGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise Double IPA || 8.00 || $  3.00 || 8.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || Half Pint || style="background-color:ForestGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise IPA || 6.20 || $  3.00 || 6.2% || 300


|-


| Beer || Half Pint || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Sleeman Rousse || 5.50 || $  3.00 || 5.5% || 300


|-


| Beer || Half Pint || style="background-color:SaddleBrown; color:White" | Sleeman Honey Brown || 5.20 || $  3.00 || 5.2% || 300


|-


| Beer || Half Pint || style="background-color:Moccasin" | Gert's House Brew || 5.00 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || Half Pint || style="background-color:#BECF72" | Moosehead Lager || 5.00 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || Half Pint || style="background-color:Gold" | Sleeman Original || 5.00 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || Half Pint || style="background-color:LightSalmon" | St. Ambroise Apricot || 5.00 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || Half Pint || style="background-color:Chocolate; color:White" | St. Ambroise Cream Ale || 5.00 || $  3.00 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Liquor || Drink || style="background-color:#EB9E01; color:White" | Jagermeister, Bailey's, Goldshlager, JD Honey, Fireball || 4.00 || $  3.00 || 40.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || Drink || style="background-color:#Gainsboro;" | Rail Liquor || 4.00 || $  3.00 || 40.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || Drink || style="background-color:#9d702e;color:White" | Rum || 3.50 || $  3.00 || 35.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || Drink || style="background-color:#96211c; color:White" | Southern Comfort || 3.50 || $  3.00 || 35.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || Drink || style="background-color:#FFD7B5" | Triple Sec || 3.50 || $  3.00 || 35.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || Drink || style="background-color:#D63834;color:White" | Fireball || 3.30 || $  3.00 || 33.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || Drink || style="background-color:#FFCBA4" | Amaretto || 2.30 || $  3.00 || 23.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || Drink || style="background-color:PeachPuff" | Peach Shnapps || 2.30 || $  3.00 || 23.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || Drink || style="background-color:#C08EB4" | Pornstar || 2.10 || $  3.00 || 21.0% || 30


|}






{|

 class="wikitable collapsible sortable alternating"
! Class !! Size !! Type !! Gertz [Gz] !! Cost !! Percent !! Volume [mL]


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:DarkOliveGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise Double IPA || 14.40 || $10.00 || 8.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:ForestGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise IPA || 11.16 || $10.00 || 6.2% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Sleeman Rousse || 9.90 || $10.00 || 5.5% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:SaddleBrown; color:White" | Sleeman Honey Brown || 9.36 || $10.00 || 5.2% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:Moccasin" | Gert's House Brew || 9.00 || $10.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:#BECF72" | Moosehead Lager || 9.00 || $10.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:Gold" | Sleeman Original || 9.00 || $10.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:LightSalmon" | St. Ambroise Apricot || 9.00 || $10.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:Chocolate; color:White" | St. Ambroise Cream Ale || 9.00 || $10.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|}






{|

 class="wikitable collapsible sortable alternating"
! Class !! Size !! Type !! Gertz [Gz] !! Cost !! Percent !! Volume [mL]


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:DarkOliveGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise Double IPA || 14.40 || $10.00 || 8.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Sleeman Rousse || 12.38 || $  8.00 || 5.5% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:SaddleBrown; color:White" | Sleeman Honey Brown || 11.70 || $  8.00 || 5.2% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:Moccasin" | Gert's House Brew || 11.25 || $  8.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:Gold" | Sleeman Original || 11.25 || $  8.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:ForestGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise IPA || 11.16 || $10.00 || 6.2% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:#BECF72" | Moosehead Lager || 9.00 || $10.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:LightSalmon" | St. Ambroise Apricot || 9.00 || $10.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || Pitcher || style="background-color:Chocolate; color:White" | St. Ambroise Cream Ale || 9.00 || $10.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|}

==General List==


{|

 class="wikitable collapsible sortable alternating"
! Class !! Type !! Item !! Gertz [Gz] !! Cost !! Percent !! Volume [mL]


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:DarkOliveGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise Double IPA || Pitcher || 9.60 || $15.00 || 8.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightSteelBlue" | Fin du Monde || Pitcher || 9.00 || $18.00 || 9.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:DarkOliveGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise Double IPA || Pint || 8.00 || $  6.00 || 8.0% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:ForestGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise IPA || Pitcher || 7.44 || $15.00 || 6.2% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightSteelBlue" | Fin du Monde || Pint || 7.20 || $  7.50 || 9.0% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:DarkOliveGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise Double IPA || Half Pint || 6.86 || $  3.50 || 8.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Sleeman Rousse || Pitcher || 6.60 || $15.00 || 5.5% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:SaddleBrown; color:White" | Sleeman Honey Brown || Pitcher || 6.24 || $15.00 || 5.2% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:ForestGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise IPA || Pint || 6.20 || $  6.00 || 6.2% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Moccasin" | Gert's House Brew || Pitcher || 6.00 || $15.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:#BECF72" | Moosehead Lager || Pitcher || 6.00 || $15.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Gold" | Sleeman Original || Pitcher || 6.00 || $15.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightSalmon" | St. Ambroise Apricot || Pitcher || 6.00 || $15.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Chocolate; color:White" | St. Ambroise Cream Ale || Pitcher || 6.00 || $15.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:#102C73;color:White" | PBR || Tallboy || 5.79 || $  4.00 || 4.9% || 473


|-


| Sangria || style="background-color:#e0c9ff" | Flood-Gria || Pitcher || 5.64 || $17.00 || 40.0% || 1800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Sleeman Rousse || Pint || 5.50 || $  6.00 || 5.5% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightSteelBlue" | Fin du Monde || Half Pint || 5.40 || $  5.00 || 9.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:ForestGreen; color:White" | St. Ambroise IPA || Half Pint || 5.31 || $  3.50 || 6.2% || 300


|-


| Sangria || style="background-color:Gold" | Gerts Sangria || Pitcher || 5.21 || $17.00 || 40.0% || 1800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:SaddleBrown; color:White" | Sleeman Honey Brown || Pint || 5.20 || $  6.00 || 5.2% || 600


|-


| Sangria || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Red Sangria || Pitcher || 5.01 || $17.00 || 17.8% || 1800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Moccasin" | Gert's House Brew || Pint || 5.00 || $  6.00 || 5.0% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:#BECF72" | Moosehead Lager || Pint || 5.00 || $  6.00 || 5.0% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Gold" | Sleeman Original || Pint || 5.00 || $  6.00 || 5.0% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightSalmon" | St. Ambroise Apricot || Pint || 5.00 || $  6.00 || 5.0% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Chocolate; color:White" | St. Ambroise Cream Ale || Pint || 5.00 || $  6.00 || 5.0% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LimeGreen" | Carlsberg || Pitcher || 5.00 || $18.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LemonChiffon" | Mystique Cider || Pitcher || 5.00 || $18.00 || 5.0% || 1,800


|-


| Sangria || style="background-color:#8de0d3" | Green Sangria || Pitcher || 4.89 || $17.00 || 17.3% || 1800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Sleeman Rousse || Bottle || 4.88 || $  4.00 || 5.5% || 355


|-


| Sangria || style="background-color:OrangeRed;color:White" | Tequila Sangria || Pitcher || 4.76 || $17.00 || 37.5% || 1800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightCoral" | Sleeman Rousse || Half Pint || 4.71 || $  3.50 || 5.5% || 300


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:SaddleBrown; color:White" | Sleeman Honey Brown || Bottle || 4.62 || $  4.00 || 5.2% || 355


|-


| Sangria || style="background-color:Azure" | White Sangria || Pitcher || 4.59 || $17.00 || 16.3% || 1800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:SaddleBrown; color:White" | Sleeman Honey Brown || Half Pint || 4.46 || $  3.50 || 5.2% || 300


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:#a3b74b" | Moosehead || Bottle || 4.44 || $  4.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Chocolate; color:White" | Sleeman Cream Ale || Bottle || 4.44 || $  4.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Gold" | Sleeman Original || Bottle || 4.44 || $  4.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:#3AB34A" | Sleeman Silver Creek || Bottle || 4.44 || $  4.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:#937565" | St. Ambroise Stout || Bottle || 4.44 || $  4.00 || 5.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Moccasin" | Gert's House Brew || Half Pint || 4.29 || $  3.50 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:#BECF72" | Moosehead Lager || Half Pint || 4.29 || $  3.50 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Gold" | Sleeman Original || Half Pint || 4.29 || $  3.50 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LightSalmon" | St. Ambroise Apricot || Half Pint || 4.29 || $  3.50 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Chocolate; color:White" | St. Ambroise Cream Ale || Half Pint || 4.29 || $  3.50 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Sangria || style="background-color:Pink" | Pink Sangria || Pitcher || 4.27 || $17.00 || 30.5% || 1800


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Silver" | A Tout le Monde (Megadeath) || Pitcher || 4.20 || $18.00 || 4.2% || 1,800


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#Gainsboro;" | Rail Liquor || Pitcher (6 shots) || 4.00 || $18.00 || 40.0% || 180


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LimeGreen" | Carlsberg || Pint || 4.00 || $  7.50 || 5.0% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LemonChiffon" | Mystique Cider || Pint || 4.00 || $  7.50 || 5.0% || 600


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:#DCE4B1" | Moosehead Light || Bottle || 3.55 || $  4.00 || 4.0% || 355


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:#B8D9EB" | Sleeman Clear || Bottle || 3.55 || $  4.00 || 4.0% || 355


|-


| Sangria || style="background-color:Snow" | Snowgria || Pitcher || 3.46 || $17.00 || 12.3% || 1800


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#Gainsboro;" | Rail Liquor || Shot || 3.43 || $  3.50 || 40.0% || 30


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Silver" | A Tout le Monde (Megadeath) || Pint || 3.36 || $  7.50 || 4.2% || 600


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#9d702e;color:White" | Rum || Shot || 3.00 || $  3.50 || 35.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#96211c; color:White" | Southern Comfort || Shot || 3.00 || $  3.50 || 35.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#FFD7B5" | Triple Sec || Shot || 3.00 || $  3.50 || 35.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#EB9E01; color:White" | Jagermeister, Bailey's, Goldshlager, JD Honey, Fireball || Shot || 3.00 || $  4.00 || 40.0% || 30


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LimeGreen" | Carlsberg || Half Pint || 3.00 || $  5.00 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:LemonChiffon" | Mystique Cider || Half Pint || 3.00 || $  5.00 || 5.0% || 300


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#EB9E01; color:White" | Jagermeister, Bailey's, Goldshlager, JD Honey, Fireball || Drink || 2.67 || $  4.50 || 40.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#Gainsboro;" | Rail Liquor || Drink || 2.67 || $  4.50 || 40.0% || 30


|-


| Beer || style="background-color:Silver" | A Tout le Monde (Megadeath) || Half Pint || 2.52 || $  5.00 || 4.2% || 300


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#D63834;color:White" | Fireball || Shot || 2.48 || $  4.00 || 33.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#9d702e;color:White" | Rum || Drink || 2.33 || $  4.50 || 35.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#96211c; color:White" | Southern Comfort || Drink || 2.33 || $  4.50 || 35.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#FFD7B5" | Triple Sec || Drink || 2.33 || $  4.50 || 35.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#D63834;color:White" | Fireball || Drink || 2.20 || $  4.50 || 33.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#FFCBA4" | Amaretto || Shot || 1.97 || $  3.50 || 23.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:PeachPuff" | Peach Shnapps || Shot || 1.97 || $  3.50 || 23.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#C08EB4" | Pornstar || Shot || 1.80 || $  3.50 || 21.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#FFCBA4" | Amaretto || Drink || 1.53 || $  4.50 || 23.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:PeachPuff" | Peach Shnapps || Drink || 1.53 || $  4.50 || 23.0% || 30


|-


| Liquor || style="background-color:#C08EB4" | Pornstar || Drink || 1.40 || $  4.50 || 21.0% || 30


|}